To All of Us, (millennials perhaps), in search of our ‘unicorn’.
Have you heard of the unicorn? It is new to me. Supposedly it is some magical creature that will prance into our lives and whisk us away into a world of love and devotion and happiness.
Oh wait, maybe I do know of the unicorn. Maybe to me he comes as a prince. A prince whose arms will carry me to great adventure, whose eyes will transform me into a reassured queen.
I am riding with a stranger to a concert. He blasts the music and speeds down the midnight highway, making me exhilarated and nervous at the same time. He is my age, mid thirties. We have good rapport. Other than his driving I don’t feel unsafe. He tells me how he works only as much as he needs to travel and party. “My parents have land I can live on. The only reason I don’t stay there now is because I haven’t met my unicorn yet.”
He glances at me sideways. I think he should keep his eyes on the road. “Maybe you will be my unicorn,” he smirks. I look him straight in the eye, at his wild, cocky sense of righteousness, his defiance of boundaries, and I say, certain despite our shared laughter and adventure, “I doubt it.”
We summon unicorns from the pits of our lows. From late night after-parties, from backseats driving home, from morning after heavy eyes. From excuses why the last fling fell apart, or why the last adventure failed. It is then that we seek their salvation.
But spoiler alert, unicorns aren’t real! Or maybe they are real, but then they become too real. With all magic, there is a catch.
A unicorn can only stay a unicorn with another unicorn.
To keep magic, we must be magic.
So how can we expect to just go about life, as we are, avoiding the work, avoiding awareness, avoiding ourselves, avoiding discomfort and accountability and real connection, and then skip forward to all the magical rewards.
No sir, no ma’am…to every goal there is a road…and trials…sorry.
And why do we even fantasize about the unicorn, and say it is what we want, while we spend our lives proving the opposite? Craving closeness but practicing distance, craving balance but playing in extremes. Even if we found our unicorn, our entire training is against everything it offers.
Even the most perfect unicorn could not help you embrace something you’ve trained yourself to avoid.
And where might you find that unicorn? If the one you’re wanting is to carry you out of some life, some habit, some mindset…why would you find her by staying there?
Will I find my adventurous prince while I wait in my house? If I’ve waited so long to feel beautiful, for him to tell me, will I even be able to believe it when he does?
Maybe our mystical beasts will pass through on vacation. Fate…luck…divine mercy. But then they will leave, and without the training, without the work, could we follow? Sometimes we are so brave. Or if not, and they decided to stay, could they stay magical?
So that is it then. What we want most is what we are choosing. Mostly we want it all, we want both. We want to live unhindered, and we want to dream, and so the unicorn is a creature of dreams.
But for those who want to wake up, don’t worry. The unicorn still exists.
Just that…to find a unicorn, you must become a unicorn.
And you can…
Sincerely, A Unicorn-in-training.